Say What? Overheard on the Plane Edition 21

Welcome to another Saturday edition of Overheard on the Plane.

Check out Say What? Overheard on the Plane Editions 1-20 and of course keep sending in your stories for future posts to adam@pointmetotheplane.com. Remember to include the carrier and route as well as any other pertinent details and sources. The Overheard on the Plane AA miles contest expired August 31,but all entries starting today will be counted for the Fall contest.  Three lucky submissions will be randomly selected to receive 500 AA miles, with no maximum entries this time around.  As of today we only have enough submissions for 2 more editions!

Submitted by Helen in Sioux Falls, SD courtesy of OHEverywhere

Delta Flight from Los Angeles (LAX) to Atlanta (ATL)
Guy #1 while finding his seat: Awwww, man, you’re supposed to be a leggy blonde.
Guy #2: Yeah, sorry, I’m just a fat Asian.

Submitted by Shirley in Billings, MT

Arrivals Hall with a group of girls who had just arrived via connection from New Orleans
Loud Girl:  Look, we were in New Orleans, and they were passing out free condoms. On the outside they say “protect your personal stimulus package”!

Submitted by Jon in Miami, FL courtesy of OHEverywhere

Immigration Control at MIA (Miami)
Guy 1: Ken, so what did you think about Costa Rica overall?
Guy 2: Well it was…(pause)
Guy 1: Come on Ken it’s alright.
Guy 3: Well, hey, what’s a trip to Latin America without a bastard child?

Submitted by Aaron in Philly courtesy of  4VFR

San Jose (SJC) Airport
Another two from the vault, the second one applies evermore today!

A DC-10 had an exceedingly long rollout after landing with his approach speed a little high.
San Jose Tower: American 751 heavy, turn right at the end of the runway, if able. If not able, take the Guadalupe exit off Highway 101 and make a right at the light to return to the airport.

Tower: Eastern 702, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 124.7.
Eastern 702: Tower, Eastern 702 switching to Departure. By the way, after we lifted off we saw some kind of dead animal on the far end of the runway.
Tower: Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, contact Departure on 124.7. Did you copy that report from Eastern?
Continental 635: Continental 635, cleared for takeoff, roger; and yes, we copied Eastern and we’ve already notified our caterers.

Submitted by Jacob in Jackson Hole, WY courtesy of OH

Baggage Claim Jackson Hole (JAC)
A guy was talking about recent trip to San Antonio…
Guy 1: We wanted to go to Sea World, but we just didn’t have time.
Slightly ditzy female coworker: There’s no Sea World in San Antonio.
Guy 1: Yes, there is.
Female coworker: But San Antonio is landlocked!

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