Say What? Overheard on the Plane (Throwback Edition 5)

by Adam

Happy holidays!  Here we go with Throwback Edition 5…

Submitted by Aaron in Philadelphia, PA

US Airways Flight from Washington, DC (DCA) to Charlotte (CLT)
Flight Attendant: Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks are in the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children or other adults acting like children.

Submitted by Beth in Toronto, Ontario

Air Canada flight from Vancouver (YVR) to Toronto (YYZ)
A Canadian airline pilot wrote in his journal that on one particular flight due to strong crosswinds, he had unfortunately hammered his ship onto the runway with a very hard greeting. The airline had a policy which required the first officer on the flight to stand at the exit door while the passengers disembarked, smile and repeat “thanks for ?flying with us”. His comments indicated that, in light of the poor landing, he avoided eye contact with the passengers in an attempt to avoid any smart comments that might result. Finally there was only one little old lady left to exit the plane. Walking slowly up the aisle with a cane, she approached the awaiting first officer and said:
Little Old Lady: Sir, do you mind if I ask ?you a question?
First Officer: Why, no, Ma’am, what is it?
Little Old Lady: Did we land, or were we shot down?

Submitted by Debbie in Montreal, Quebec

WestJet flight from Toronto (YYZ) to Edmonton (YEG)
Flight Attendant after a hard landing: That was quite a bump, and I know what you’re all thinking… I’m here to tell you it wasn’t the airline’s fault, it wasn’t the pilot’s fault, it wasn’t the flight attendant’s fault…it was the asphalt!

Submitted by Carl

Southwest flight from California connecting to West Virginia 
Flight Attendant: We thank you for flying Southwest. We know you have many travel options. Luckily for us you couldn’t afford those.

Submitted by Hazel in Atlanta, GA

Delta flight from Charleston, SC (CHS) to Atlanta (ATL)
Flight Attendant: Thank you for flying Delta. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride.

Submitted by SC Flier

US Airways flight from Phoenix, AZ (PHX) to Charlotte, NC (CLT)
Announcement from the flight deck while taxiing for our departure
Pilot: Ladies and gentlemen seated on the left, this is what happens when you don’t pay full price for your flight. You have to pull your plane away from the gate.
The annual jet-pull charity fundraiser was underway in front of the hangar with teams of employees pulling the US Airways A319 with the Arizona Cardinals livery.  The Cardinals mascot was there with them.

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Daichovo December 25, 2012 - 10:53 am

United flight LAX to EWR

This plane is flying to Newark, NJ. If your destination is not Newark, please make your way to the back of the plane, where we can make alternate travel arrangements via the laundry chute.

Cook December 26, 2012 - 7:39 am

Fun, but I wish there were some new entries…


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